24 Dreaming
Right now, fedoras are plotting to write books about a twittery carrot. My pillowcase and snorkel are squeaky, and Turin shrouds that I work with may be robotic.

I'm Federal Agent Jack Bauer, and this is the most restless mechanical digger of my life.

By Kevan in 2002, also to blame for the Surrealist Link
For greater coherence, try 24ever
Previously on 24...