TV Misguidance

RANSOM-NOTE
TELEVISION
LISTINGS

Listings are created from individual lines taken from existing listings magazines.

Non-spliced humour? Try the Other Listings Magazine.

Concept:
Graham Sadler

Contributors:
Kevan Davis
Graham Sadler

Sources:
Guardian Guide
Guardian Unlimited
Radio Times
et al

(To join in, just submit a programme. But make sure you know what this site's about, first.)

       

TV Misguidance has been mothballed, since it was only getting submissions from people who hadn't understood the joke, and people getting it mixed up with Other Listings Magazine.
10th March 2002
21.00
KD
Bird, Bird and Bird Rory Bremner, John Bird and John Fortune deliver stuffed eagles.
21.00
KD
Four Murders and a Lioness Comedy romance with Hugh Grant and his pals flopping about in a Kenyan game reserve.
23.35
KD
The X Weather Mulder revisits the classic 1936 film Night Weatherview.
0:40 Pages from Ceefax (S) 1:00 Sport : Puppy Biking from Chichester (R) 2:00 Work Essentials : Monster Trucks (S) 2:55 News 3:00 Work Essentials : Spanish (S) (T) 3:05 Pages from Ceefax 3:25 Nightscreen 4:00 Sport : Robot Biking Live from Chichester

4th March 2002
20.30
KD
Changing Crime Scenes The team receive a shock when they arrive at an empty blood-spattered room with a big budget.
0:50 Open University : Pencils Theory (S) 1:00 Open University : Advanced Spanish Theory (R) 1:35 Work Essentials : Frogs (S) (T) 2:00 Local Weather (S) 2:15 Sport : Long-Distance Cat Chasing from Bognor Regis 2:35 Work Essentials : Water (S)

27th February 2002
20.30
KD
Law Laundry The team help an Ipswich couple get rid of social values, seek non-violent gambling laws.
20.30
KD
[FILM] Robogardener II Alan Titchmarsh goes back with Peter Weller's cyborg at Home Farm.

26th February 2002
19.30
KD
[FILM] Arrest and Dinner A killer cooked in stout and dumplings, faced by Lambeth police.
21.00
KD
[FILM] Outside Ikea Thriller about a man who escaped from a maximum-Swedish superstore.

20th February 2002
15.40
GS
[FILM] Madame Liam Drama about a lawyer who defends a woman accused of murder, little suspecting she is actually in Liverpool at the height of the pre-Second World War depression.
18.00
GS
Home and Location Friction and nerves give way to joy in the leafy suburbs of Sheffield for around £140,000.
19.30
GS
Your Future Tonight Further reports on the current state of late-night celebrity chat.
19.55
GS
The Political Sex Slot A leading spokesperson from Plaid Cymru examines a hot new gay club.
20.30
GS
Location, Location - Live! Kirstie Allsopp and Phil Spencer help a couple move off the bottom of the table.
22.00
GS
[FILM] Death on Wheels Comedy charting the romantic misadventures of a countryside district gang of drug-dealers.
23.20
GS
Make-up Grandstand Action from the men's cosmetics industry, including anti-wrinkle creams.
1:00 Ivor the Engine (S) 1:25 Sport : Outdoor Brick Racing Live from Birmingham 2:00 Close (S) 3:00 Pobol y Cwm 4:00 Learning Zone : A-Level Sausages (S) 5:00 Local Weather 6:00 Pobol y Cwm

16th February 2002
12.00
GS
Football Score Preview of the weekend's results.
18.30
GS
Crime Date Writer Francis Fyfield, private detective Noel Hogan and crime reporter Yasmin Pasha piece together more pretty young things hoping to be lucky in love.
19.00
GS
The Lawrence Olivier Club Reps A Scottish practical joker and a group of lads who trash the ceremony honouring the best stage stars in the business.
20.00
GS
Bigfoot Witness Mysteries surrounding the ape-like creature said to inhabit a Buddhist community in Scotland.
21.00
GS
1984 and Horses Del thinks his luck can't get any worse after the council rejects his questions on the trends and events of 1984.
21.45
GS
[FILM] Les Footloose A 12th Century knight and his idiotic manservant find themselves catapulted into a preacher who has banned dancing.
22.00
GS
Fame and Investigation Grissom investigates an apparent suicide, but later suspects the victim was examining how celebrities manage to make monumental mistakes.
0:50 Open University : Intermediate Socks (T) 1:00 The Clangers (R) (S) (T) 2:00 The Clangers 3:00 The Clangers 3:10 Open University : Intermediate Babies 4:00 Sport : Under-15s Deathmatch Needle Riding (S) 4:35 Close (T)

14th February 2002
19.00
GS
Vets in Question Bristol vet Trude Mostue fears for the life of Conservative backbencher Anne Widdecombe, Express columnist Carol Sarler and Chief Executive of British Airways Rod Eddington.
21.00
GS
This is Ray Mears' Extreme Horizon The survival expert travels from the bitter cold of the Arctic to the baking heat of the Sahara, where he pays tribute to another of the nation's parrallel universes.

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