TV Misguidance

RANSOM-NOTE
TELEVISION
LISTINGS

Listings are created from individual lines taken from existing listings magazines.

Non-spliced humour? Try the Other Listings Magazine.

Concept:
Graham Sadler

Contributors:
Kevan Davis
Graham Sadler

Sources:
Guardian Guide
Guardian Unlimited
Radio Times
et al

(To join in, just submit a programme. But make sure you know what this site's about, first.)

       

This has been mothballed, since it was only being submitted to by
confused passers-by, and people getting it mixed up with Other Listings Magazine.

14th December 2001
19.00
GS
Secrets Of Wildlife War Account of the development of long-range flying snakes which existed 100 million years before the first primates.
20.00
GS
Floyd's Curry Inferno Chef Keith Floyd gets the blame for the cuisine that swept through the streets of Rome in 64AD.
20.30
GS
Man-Eaters In India Guests, including wolves, dogs and dingoes, talk about the cosmopolitan city of Calcutta.
21.00
GS
[FILM] Viking Shop Voyage A couple attempt to patch up their marriage by taking a trip shopping in a replica Viking longboat.

13th December 2001
19.10
GS
Smash Hits World Wrestling Prize 2001 Matthew Collings introduces the star-studded grappling action with Atomic Kitten and S Club 7.
0:20 Ivor the Engine (R) (S) (T) 1:00 Pages from Ceefax 2:00 Weather 3:00 Sport : Amateur Underwater World-Cup Politician Throwing 3:10 Work Essentials : Beds (S) 4:00 Sport : Shirt Skiing (S) 4:45 Pobol y Cwm 5:00 Work Essentials : Politics (T)

12th December 2001
13.10
GS
[FILM] Big Prince Power Rat Classic adventure starring David Niven as the 18th century Scottish leader who tried to defeat the English by building a giant laser cannon.
20.00
KD
Who Wants To Be Cut? Partners put their heads through the weird and perfect circle.
20.30
KD
Web Practice Mandy finds how the Internet challenges flamingoes, giant crocodiles and millions.
21.00
KD
One Fish in the Past Sammy vows to plan the September 11 attacks on ciclid fish.
21.30
GS
Wild Deception Box Joan Bakewell looks at the world of bigamous lakes and rivers.
22.00
GS
Stories In Colour Sammy gets her marching orders from a blank canvas of a lawn creating some of the most spectactular roofs of buses.

6th December 2001
19.30
GS
Trauma Family Yvonne discovers Fran is planning to save the life of a car crash victim.
20.30
GS
Sex Practise Abby is convinced something sinister is going on behind the closed doors of the sex industry in Latin America.
22.00
GS
Trash At The Top Documentary charting Marks & Spencer's clothing range since being taken over by a tribe of pimps and vice girls.
0:55 Sport : Raven Spitting Finals (S) 1:00 Sport : Air Shooting from Croydon 2:00 Pobol y Cwm 2:10 Open University : Algebra (T) 3:00 The Clangers 3:40 The Clangers (S) 4:00 Sport : Underwater Literacy Eating 5:00 Open University : Boulders

5th December 2001
20.00
GS
Who Wants A Girl? Gameshow challenging contestants to answer 15 consecutive questions to win a 22-year-old female classical cellist.
21.30
GS
Grime Zone Islamic scholars attempt to enlighten the Western media about the concept of contaminated poultry being sold to humans.
23.10
GS
The History Of Artists And Torture How methods of punishment have been influenced by Leonardo da Vinci and Michelangelo.
23.45
GS
[FILM] Animal Pastimes Al Pacino and Marlon Brando pose as prostitutes, hoping to attract a couple of Yorkshire Terriers.

4th December 2001
18.00
GS
Cold Friends Pete buys Ross's wedding, while Rachel pushes Karen and Mark.
19.00
KD
Animal Blood Horror Yorkshire terriers are brought in to be destined for petfood, to a rodent head at the Garden Show.
20.30
GS
University Property Challenge St Hugh's, Oxford, take on Churchill, Cambridge to win their dream home.
21.00
KD
House of Vikings Portrait of Italian Renaissance plumber who fails to fix a single bloody end to the Viking Age.
23.20
GS
Real Life War Adventures A Manchester couple, armed with little more than spears and shields, find themselves stuck in the Second World War.
1:00 Pornography 2:00 Local Weather (T) 2:45 Open University : Advanced Socks Theory (T) 3:00 Pobol y Cwm (T) 3:50 News (R) (T) 4:00 Close 4:30 Sport : Topless Deathmatch Bamboo Jumping from Brazil 5:00 Ivor the Engine

3rd December 2001
08.00
KD
GMTV War Lorraine Kelly suggests a sackful of ideas for surviving horrors of the protracted siege at Eshowe, which lasted 25 years previously. Supernatural horror, starring Ross Blofeld in Dictionary Corner.
13.00
KD
Gangland Games Steve Le Fevre presents the death of an escort girl, and Amanda prepares to give drugs.
22.00
GS
[FILM] In The Bleak Romance Comedy, starring Michael Keaton and Geena Davis as speechwriters who meet by chance and immediately sell some stolen cocaine.
0:15 Close (S) 1:00 Pages from Ceefax 1:25 Pobol y Cwm (S) 2:00 Pages from Ceefax 3:00 News (S) 4:00 Pages from Ceefax (T) 5:00 The Clangers (R) (S) 6:00 Sport : Air Shooting (S)

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